BULLYING

What is bullying?

Bullying occurs when teasing goes too far and the victim is afraid that the bully will cause harm. Bullying behaviors include teasing, taunting, threatening, physical intimidation and sometimes actual physical harm. Bullying comes in different forms as well; boys will generally engage in physical methods while girls often engage in more subtle behaviors like ridicule and rumor spreading. The three key components of bullying are intent to do harm, imbalance of power and repeated behavior.

Important Facts about Bullying:

10-15% of children in U.S. schools say that they are regularly bullied.
Bullying most frequently takes place in school, out of the earshot of teachers.
In school, bullying most often takes place where there is little supervision, like the playground, hallways or cafeteria.
Most bullying is verbal rather than physical.
Boys bully both boys and girls. Girls tend to bully other girls.
Victims are often taunted because of their physical appearance or because they appear to be vulnerable.

Source: Debra Viadero

Issues	Action
How do you empower your child to stand up to a bully?	Teach your child how to use assertive language or to walk away. If the behavior persists, get the help of an adult.
What do you do when you are told your child is a bully?	Make it clear that you will not tolerate bullying behaviors and that there will be consequences if the behavior continues. Talk to your child about appropriate behaviors and language to use with peers. Teach your child about how to be a friend and how to better handle anger and frustration.
What do you do when your child is a victim of bullying?	Look out for warning signs: not wanting to go to school, lack of friends, unexplained injuries and anxiety about school. Inform the school and make sure that the bully is responded to. Responses will vary depending on the school politics. Reassure your child that the bullying is not his or her fault and that you are there to help.
What do you do when you see bullying?	Make a decision about whether or not to intervene. Let your judgment guide you – do you know the kids involved? At home it should be stopped immediately. At school, inform the teacher or another personnel member
What is the role of the school in preventing bullying?	Talk to your school’s guidance counselor or administrator. Each school handles bullying differently. Get involved and help implement a zero tolerance policy!
What can parents do to prevent bullying?	Teach your child what bullying is and stress that it is unacceptable. Tell your child how it makes other people feel and how it will shape their thinking about themselves. Talk to your child’s school. Form an anti-bullying task force. Encourage your school to implement a school-wide anti-bullying program. Hire a specialist to train adults and children about anti-bullying strategies. Help your children to understand that kindness is the language of friendship.
Is there ever a good time to recommend that your child hit back?	Violence is never an appropriate reaction to bullying unless your child feels they are in immediate danger of being harmed. A physical reaction is always the last resort.

SOME TIPS FOR KIDS:

Strategies to use if you are a victim of bullying:

Tell! TELL a friend who will listen, support and stand up for you. TELL a teacher. Most bullying happens when teachers aren’t around and they can’t help you unless you tell. TELL a parent and ask for his or her help.

Twenty Things to do Instead of hurting Someone: Click Here